Archive for July 2026

The Jewelry Box

July 30, 2026


“In the house of the righteous there is much treasure, but trouble befalls the income of the wicked.” (Proverbs 15:6)

It opened up wide without a squeak. The varnished wood had a shine that had not dulled over the decades of its existence. I wondered how many times my dad had opened it over the years, looking for what would complete him for the day ahead.

The box had sat on top of my dad’s chest of drawers for as long as the place I lived was my parents’ residence: 1607 Thomas Street, Ironton, Ohio. In my growing-up years, the only time I opened it was to see if there was any loose change I could sneak away with. My parents were organized, never leaving a few coins sitting out in the open. I had to be the family thief, a label that carried a lot of Baptist guilt with it and stayed with me long after the clinking coins had disappeared into the cashier’s hand at the neighborhood market. After all, Mallo Cups weren’t free. They came with a price tag.

My dad passed away eight years ago. Thankfully, he went to be greeted by his Maker before COVID made living for many of the elderly unbearable. Dad was a social guy, always willing to get into conversations with people, whether they were in line for a slab of Kahn’s bologna at the Food Fair supermarket, before or after worship at Beulah Baptist Church, or with his next-door Pakistani doctors as they stood together in the front yard. COVID would have killed him. Better to head towards paradise four months short of 90 years of age.

As I scanned the contents of his jewelry box, his friendliness was evident in the mementos. There were Rotary label pins. He loved being a Rotarian. He and my mom even were the host family for a high school exchange student from Finland who had been sponsored by Rotary. Dad made the weekly Rotary Club lunch a priority on his schedule.

In a small slot, I dug out a political campaign button that said: “Nixon Now.” Dad never talked about politics, but I was pretty sure he was a Democrat. Finding a “Nixon Now” button made me wonder whether he had switched at some point, and why. Did Watergate make him consider the direction of the folk in D.C.? Or did things take a turn during a later Republican administration?

Tie clasps. My dad never wore a tie that wasn’t attached to a clasp. Most of them had a pin in the back that pushed through the fabric and anchored the front. One featured the United States Navy. He had served in the Navy in the late 40s as a baker, ready to take to the seas but spared that by the end of the military conflict. Navy defined Dad. He looked forward to the Army-Navy football game each fall so he could cheer the Middies on.

When I removed the top shelf of the jewelry box, I discovered another rare, military-related item underneath: My dad’s Selective Service System registration certificate, his entry document into the Navy. He was patriotic, a proud veteran, and part of a family of veterans. Although I did not enter the military, my older brother did, and Dad was extremely proud of how he had served in Vietnam…even though he had gone the Army way.

Two wristwatches appropriately signaled the value Dad placed on time, specifically being on time. He was organized and elevated the following of a schedule to being close to godliness. One of the watches had a wristband that indicated it had been through a few decades. The other watch could have been worn at state dinner functions if Dad ever went to one…which he didn’t!

Tucked in the back corner was a pearl-handled pocket knife. Dad seemed to always carry one with him in case there was a string that needed to be cut, or a piece of wood that needed a slight trim. He had a custom of gifting a pocket knife to his sons and grandsons. I still have mine, but it’s at the bottom of a catch-all basket, patiently waiting for me to seek its usefulness.

His high school class ring with a bit of tarnish was pushed into a holding section. I had to find a good light to see that its inscription was “Oil Springs High School”, with some kind of creature’s head protruding from the top. Another ring was a gift from the Purina Corporation he worked for in my early childhood years. It said “Salesmanship” on it, indicating the value that Dad put into his work.

There were other pins for other reasons: A Bob Evans farm pin, two State of Ohio pins and one “Oh! Kentucky” piece, a Brasil pin (spelled that way) that must have come from a Rotary exchange of some kind, and an AARP pin that probably was a reward for hitting his 80s.

I almost missed a bracelet that had become camouflaged into the fabric. It had “Laurence Wolfe, Wittensville, KY” inscribed. When I turned it over, I was brought to tears by the name “Jenny” written on the back, my mom’s name. It was a reminder of the love of his life for close to 65 years.

And, finally, there were keys…keys whose only purpose was to reside in the pockets of the jewelry box. One was for a suitcase that has long since disappeared, and the others were homeless. Perhaps Dad left them there for reasons, like to remind us that everyone has a place even though they might have forgotten what it is.

Treasures. Memories. Carriers taking me back to him and how he shaped me into who I am. It made me consider what I’m putting into a jewelry box for my kids and grandkids, not necessarily one with varnished wood and hinges, but memories and values that they will take from my life.

Gratitude-ful

July 25, 2026

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; teach and admonish one another in all wisdom; and with gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God.” (Colossians 3:16)

If you gather a few long-timers, like myself and others whose knees also making cracking sounds, we will surely talk about how it used to be. We will get all starry-eyed and emotional thinking about when we only had three TV stations to choose from (one of them as fuzzy as a month-long unshaven senior citizen). We may even remember the days we had to cook our own dinner not from a box or in a microwave, but rather from scratch. We refer to the glory days of our youth.

However, most of us…no, all of us have adjusted to the times. We adapted to microwaveable family-sized meals and have no desire to go back to how it used to be. “How it used to be” is now a display in a museum meant to entertain and amaze younger audiences. We adapted to the new ways that are either faster, more convenient, less labor-intensive, or don’t require a learned skill set. We adapted and now, instead of considering a return to what we grew up with, we think of what could be another improvement. We’ve made what is better a part of our lifestyle and have now become consumers to demand more.

In fact, our culture now includes consumers who are adult versions of whining kids, quick to post on social media about the plumber who showed up thirty minutes later than he said he would and berating the sudden disappearance of one of our 145 cable channels. In other words, we b become accustomed to what is better and acquire a sense of entitlement about receiving more.

How do we avoid being snotty-nosed, irritated, hard-to-get-along-with grown-ups? The key, which is hard to find amongst the critical environment we live in, is “Gratitude.” Our lives improve the moment we become thankful.

I know, I know, there’s a day each year when we do that thankful stuff. Well…perhaps…gratitude is more than a late November drive-by that has become dominated more by pro football games than gatherings around a dinner table. Gratitude is a quality that needs to resonate with us as much as our feelings about what used to be and what is. When we look around us with eyes intentionally bespectacled with gratitude, it changes our perspective. Maybe it even alters our demeanor and attitude.

As I write this, I am thankful for the cup of coffee that sits perched beside my laptop…and the thought about gratitude that planted itself inside my head…and the Lord who leads me…and the Holy Spirit that guides me…and the new day that is just beginning. When I root myself with gratitude in my heart, new psalms and songs begin to form inside my soul. In the downside of life, a spirit of gratitude keeps me anchored.

It’s what I’ll choose to lean into this day. As I lift my Yeti to my lips and take a sip of my Pike Place, I’ll seek to live out of gratitude.

Amen.

1,999 Pieces

July 14, 2026

 “Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Doesn’t she light a lamp, sweep the house, and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.’  In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” (Luke 15:8-10)

I like jigsaw puzzles. In the last ten years or so, I’ve started a tradition of doing a Christmas puzzle. I look for a new puzzle, usually on Amazon or at a summer rummage sale, that features a Christmas scene of some kind. Right after Thanksgiving, I start putting the border outline out and slowly recreating the scene.

This past Christmas, I found a 2,000-piece puzzle that was going to challenge my color-blindness limitations. There were a number of shades and tones that were difficult for me to figure out, but I gave it a go. Life busyness got in the way and the puzzle took shape at a turtle’s pace.

Christmas came and it wasn’t even close to being done. January, February, a trickle was flowing from the box onto the tapestry. March, April…surely it would be completed by Easter! I mean, the life journey had gone from the birth of Jesus to his death and resurrection…but it still wasn’t finished.

My wife Carol was beginning to wonder if I was waiting until next Christmas. Our dining room table continued to be partially “Christmas-tized.” Finally…finally, in the first week of June…it was done!

Wait a minute! All the pieces had found their rightful fit, but, what’s this…there is a missing piece…but there aren’t any other pieces! I had form-fitted 1,999 pieces. 1,999 had found their purpose for existence, but one piece…one piece had become non-resident.

I searched the floor. I went to where I was eye-level with the surface of the puzzle, hoping that my color-blindness was hiding the final solution. I searched under the living room furniture, under the curtains, and in the heating vents on the wooden dining room floor. There is something self-defeating about working a 2,000 piece puzzle that is only 99.95% complete.

Carol came up with another suggestion. Just by chance, maybe the robotic vacuum we have sucked it up. I highly doubted it, but let’s check. We took the bag that it discards its debris into after it gets back to its docking station. I thought back to the vacuum cleaners my parents had that gave you a workout, moving them, carrying them, unplugging and plugging, and the limited amount of sucking power they had.

But…let’s look. We took the bag outside (Smart idea…but not mine!) and held it over the garbage can, where we slowly emptied the massive amounts of hair, dust, more hair, crumbs, and then a quarter, more hair, and a penny. The bag was almost empty, but we were twenty-six cents ahead.

And then just as I was about to give up sifting through the dust and hair, there it was! Piece number 2,000, hiding underneath some cracker crumbs and something else that no longer resembled am item that once had purpose.

Piece #2,000! Just like the lost coin of Jesus parable, the search and more searching…and Carol’s perseverance, produced what had been missing. It’s amazing how one puzzle piece, in essence 0.05% of the picture, produced satisfaction and a change in my demeanor.

How much more do the angelic hosts sing praises over one lost person who finds the Way?

Approaching Grace

July 12, 2026

” Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)

In the midst of the valley of loss, I’ve been walking through, I came face-to-face with a road sign that said “Grace Ahead. Approach with Confidence.” The small print beneath the bright gold sign bore the words of Hebrews 4:16 in spectacular cursive curls and swirls.

The news of what lay ahead and, actually, had already been traveling in, slowed my pace and lifted my chin from its stare at my feet. Jesus had been waiting. Like a Kansas Interstate roadside rest stop, he had been awaiting my realization of the need to pull to the side, to stop for mercy, to find the welcome of grace.

Receiving mercy is not an easy thing for me. It’s a humbling indication of my stumbling humanness, a reminder that the “S” on my T-shirt doesn’t stand for Superman, but rather one of many other “S” words like stupid…and stupid…and simply stupid. In fact, I have a T-shirt that says pretty much the same thing. “S” doesn’t stand for Superman.

Receiving mercy is the promise of our Father, and yet, I too often speed by the offer, thinking that getting on with the journey is more important than a quiet encounter with my Creator.

Today, the gift of discoverable grace has so overwhelmed me that I’ve given up the fight of holding back the tears. It is my time of need, my time of stillness. The road sign from Hebrews reminds me that I don’t need to cringe in doubt and fear, that, like the story of Jesus welcoming the children, there are open arms extended for me.

I am not suddenly exiting the valley of loss, but I am assured of a traveling partner Who is incredibly comforting and understanding.

Things That Perplex Me

July 10, 2026

I have random thoughts that just come…kinda like finding a penny on a walk around the block and thinking, “This is valuable! King Soopers doesn’t even give these out anymore at the store when they give you your change.”

Random…momentary light bulbs with suspect wattage.

Like…the email I got today from Red Lobster informing me that “Endless Shrimp Would be Ending Soon!” How does something that is endless…end?

Here’s another thought that came to me last week as I watched a vehicle change lanes back and forth like the road was a slalom course. “I wonder if he changes churches that quickly; doesn’t like something in this place so he hops to the next building, and then the next, and then the next.” Lane hoppers are like church hoppers. They can’t stay the course.

Or what about the screaming kid in the grocery store, who is pushing his parent to buy that bag of candy? Why doesn’t my wife let me have what I want when I scream, fall to the ground, and kick my feet? Why does she just walk away and leave me there?

Why has my mailbox been filled with political postcards that hammer away at the evil, out-of-touch, under-qualified, overly arrogant person who is running for some elected position, while whoever sent the postcard appears in an almost angelic pose?

And… why do I get the same postcard again the next day? Are the senders trying to say something about my memory?

Whose bright idea was it to allow motorcycles to come up between two lanes at a stoplight? They are the new entitled citizens, as they sprint from the light and zoom away from us poor vehicle-driving smucks.

And now we have e-bikes that are going 30 miles an hour…on the sidewalk, passing poor Mildred, trying to take her poodle for a walk. Pretty soon, pedestrians will be walking on the grass like it’s the normal thing to do.

Why do my knees ache every time I come down the stairs in the morning…and my hips…and my lower back…and my toes…and…

Why do I feel guilty if I don’t leave a tip for the pimply-faced sixteen-year-old at the fast food establishment even after a third of my three-item order never made it into the bag? Is it my lifelong existence in Baptist congregations that causes the guilt response of a twenty percent tip?

If I decided to get a full-sleeve tattoo on my left arm, would I still be able to see the goosebumps? (I’m not, in case you’re wondering! I can barely endure my four-year-old grandson putting a sticker on the back of my hand!)

Why do ripped jeans cost more?

Why does the entertainment industry, more often than not, portray clergy persons (pastors and preachers) as doofuses, allergic to laughter, and not people you would want to have conversations with?

Random thoughts. I can’t help it. Hey! There goes a squirrel! I wonder if squirrels work eight-hour shifts and then go home to their squirrel recliners? I wonder if squirrels leave a tip for other squirrels?

Grief Coaching

July 1, 2026

Jesus wept.” (John 11:35)

My coaching buddy and friend, Joe Miller, passed away about a week and a half ago. I wrote about it in my last blog post.

Briefly summarizing, he collapsed at the end of the kids’ basketball camp session we were doing at the high school, and he could not be revived. We did CPR, got the paddles of the AED device ready, but he was gone.

Our high school girls’ basketball players were there helping with the camp for young kids. For most of them, before they were quickly ushered out of the gym, the last scene they unfortunately had to take with them of their coach was him laying on the gym floor. It’s a memory that will be difficult to heal from.

So, the last few days have had me coaching them, not in basketball, but in dealing with their grief. Grief coaching is similar to basketball coaching in that the person never reaches a point where you don’t have to work on it. Like practicing your jump shot, it’s a constant journey, an ongoing part of the game of basketball that must be worked on.

Grief is like that. It is a continuing journey that will never reach a point of finality. There will always be moments of reflecting, struggles with keeping emotions under control, and battles of isolation and inappropriate behavior. It’s a journey, a hard journey, peppered from time to time with laughter and storytelling.

Sometimes in coaching, the coach has to let the team, or an individual, work through it. He figures out when to get involved and when to sit outside the goings-on. My grief coaching mirrors that. Sometimes I need to explain, and sometimes the grievers must be allowed to go through the fires. Since grief is different for each person, as a coach, my sensitivity to the situation dictates my response. I look for the one who pulls to the side because the moment is too painful, and I look for the one who dominates conversations instead of being part of them.

Honestly, my soul is weary, and I recognize my need to grieve as part of them, but also by myself… quiet moments in the steps of long walks.

But, like with my players, it’s a journey.