Posted tagged ‘writing’

The Jewelry Box

July 30, 2026


“In the house of the righteous there is much treasure, but trouble befalls the income of the wicked.” (Proverbs 15:6)

It opened up wide without a squeak. The varnished wood had a shine that had not dulled over the decades of its existence. I wondered how many times my dad had opened it over the years, looking for what would complete him for the day ahead.

The box had sat on top of my dad’s chest of drawers for as long as the place I lived was my parents’ residence: 1607 Thomas Street, Ironton, Ohio. In my growing-up years, the only time I opened it was to see if there was any loose change I could sneak away with. My parents were organized, never leaving a few coins sitting out in the open. I had to be the family thief, a label that carried a lot of Baptist guilt with it and stayed with me long after the clinking coins had disappeared into the cashier’s hand at the neighborhood market. After all, Mallo Cups weren’t free. They came with a price tag.

My dad passed away eight years ago. Thankfully, he went to be greeted by his Maker before COVID made living for many of the elderly unbearable. Dad was a social guy, always willing to get into conversations with people, whether they were in line for a slab of Kahn’s bologna at the Food Fair supermarket, before or after worship at Beulah Baptist Church, or with his next-door Pakistani doctors as they stood together in the front yard. COVID would have killed him. Better to head towards paradise four months short of 90 years of age.

As I scanned the contents of his jewelry box, his friendliness was evident in the mementos. There were Rotary label pins. He loved being a Rotarian. He and my mom even were the host family for a high school exchange student from Finland who had been sponsored by Rotary. Dad made the weekly Rotary Club lunch a priority on his schedule.

In a small slot, I dug out a political campaign button that said: “Nixon Now.” Dad never talked about politics, but I was pretty sure he was a Democrat. Finding a “Nixon Now” button made me wonder whether he had switched at some point, and why. Did Watergate make him consider the direction of the folk in D.C.? Or did things take a turn during a later Republican administration?

Tie clasps. My dad never wore a tie that wasn’t attached to a clasp. Most of them had a pin in the back that pushed through the fabric and anchored the front. One featured the United States Navy. He had served in the Navy in the late 40s as a baker, ready to take to the seas but spared that by the end of the military conflict. Navy defined Dad. He looked forward to the Army-Navy football game each fall so he could cheer the Middies on.

When I removed the top shelf of the jewelry box, I discovered another rare, military-related item underneath: My dad’s Selective Service System registration certificate, his entry document into the Navy. He was patriotic, a proud veteran, and part of a family of veterans. Although I did not enter the military, my older brother did, and Dad was extremely proud of how he had served in Vietnam…even though he had gone the Army way.

Two wristwatches appropriately signaled the value Dad placed on time, specifically being on time. He was organized and elevated the following of a schedule to being close to godliness. One of the watches had a wristband that indicated it had been through a few decades. The other watch could have been worn at state dinner functions if Dad ever went to one…which he didn’t!

Tucked in the back corner was a pearl-handled pocket knife. Dad seemed to always carry one with him in case there was a string that needed to be cut, or a piece of wood that needed a slight trim. He had a custom of gifting a pocket knife to his sons and grandsons. I still have mine, but it’s at the bottom of a catch-all basket, patiently waiting for me to seek its usefulness.

His high school class ring with a bit of tarnish was pushed into a holding section. I had to find a good light to see that its inscription was “Oil Springs High School”, with some kind of creature’s head protruding from the top. Another ring was a gift from the Purina Corporation he worked for in my early childhood years. It said “Salesmanship” on it, indicating the value that Dad put into his work.

There were other pins for other reasons: A Bob Evans farm pin, two State of Ohio pins and one “Oh! Kentucky” piece, a Brasil pin (spelled that way) that must have come from a Rotary exchange of some kind, and an AARP pin that probably was a reward for hitting his 80s.

I almost missed a bracelet that had become camouflaged into the fabric. It had “Laurence Wolfe, Wittensville, KY” inscribed. When I turned it over, I was brought to tears by the name “Jenny” written on the back, my mom’s name. It was a reminder of the love of his life for close to 65 years.

And, finally, there were keys…keys whose only purpose was to reside in the pockets of the jewelry box. One was for a suitcase that has long since disappeared, and the others were homeless. Perhaps Dad left them there for reasons, like to remind us that everyone has a place even though they might have forgotten what it is.

Treasures. Memories. Carriers taking me back to him and how he shaped me into who I am. It made me consider what I’m putting into a jewelry box for my kids and grandkids, not necessarily one with varnished wood and hinges, but memories and values that they will take from my life.

1,999 Pieces

July 14, 2026

 “Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Doesn’t she light a lamp, sweep the house, and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.’  In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.” (Luke 15:8-10)

I like jigsaw puzzles. In the last ten years or so, I’ve started a tradition of doing a Christmas puzzle. I look for a new puzzle, usually on Amazon or at a summer rummage sale, that features a Christmas scene of some kind. Right after Thanksgiving, I start putting the border outline out and slowly recreating the scene.

This past Christmas, I found a 2,000-piece puzzle that was going to challenge my color-blindness limitations. There were a number of shades and tones that were difficult for me to figure out, but I gave it a go. Life busyness got in the way and the puzzle took shape at a turtle’s pace.

Christmas came and it wasn’t even close to being done. January, February, a trickle was flowing from the box onto the tapestry. March, April…surely it would be completed by Easter! I mean, the life journey had gone from the birth of Jesus to his death and resurrection…but it still wasn’t finished.

My wife Carol was beginning to wonder if I was waiting until next Christmas. Our dining room table continued to be partially “Christmas-tized.” Finally…finally, in the first week of June…it was done!

Wait a minute! All the pieces had found their rightful fit, but, what’s this…there is a missing piece…but there aren’t any other pieces! I had form-fitted 1,999 pieces. 1,999 had found their purpose for existence, but one piece…one piece had become non-resident.

I searched the floor. I went to where I was eye-level with the surface of the puzzle, hoping that my color-blindness was hiding the final solution. I searched under the living room furniture, under the curtains, and in the heating vents on the wooden dining room floor. There is something self-defeating about working a 2,000 piece puzzle that is only 99.95% complete.

Carol came up with another suggestion. Just by chance, maybe the robotic vacuum we have sucked it up. I highly doubted it, but let’s check. We took the bag that it discards its debris into after it gets back to its docking station. I thought back to the vacuum cleaners my parents had that gave you a workout, moving them, carrying them, unplugging and plugging, and the limited amount of sucking power they had.

But…let’s look. We took the bag outside (Smart idea…but not mine!) and held it over the garbage can, where we slowly emptied the massive amounts of hair, dust, more hair, crumbs, and then a quarter, more hair, and a penny. The bag was almost empty, but we were twenty-six cents ahead.

And then just as I was about to give up sifting through the dust and hair, there it was! Piece number 2,000, hiding underneath some cracker crumbs and something else that no longer resembled am item that once had purpose.

Piece #2,000! Just like the lost coin of Jesus parable, the search and more searching…and Carol’s perseverance, produced what had been missing. It’s amazing how one puzzle piece, in essence 0.05% of the picture, produced satisfaction and a change in my demeanor.

How much more do the angelic hosts sing praises over one lost person who finds the Way?

Things That Perplex Me

July 10, 2026

I have random thoughts that just come…kinda like finding a penny on a walk around the block and thinking, “This is valuable! King Soopers doesn’t even give these out anymore at the store when they give you your change.”

Random…momentary light bulbs with suspect wattage.

Like…the email I got today from Red Lobster informing me that “Endless Shrimp Would be Ending Soon!” How does something that is endless…end?

Here’s another thought that came to me last week as I watched a vehicle change lanes back and forth like the road was a slalom course. “I wonder if he changes churches that quickly; doesn’t like something in this place so he hops to the next building, and then the next, and then the next.” Lane hoppers are like church hoppers. They can’t stay the course.

Or what about the screaming kid in the grocery store, who is pushing his parent to buy that bag of candy? Why doesn’t my wife let me have what I want when I scream, fall to the ground, and kick my feet? Why does she just walk away and leave me there?

Why has my mailbox been filled with political postcards that hammer away at the evil, out-of-touch, under-qualified, overly arrogant person who is running for some elected position, while whoever sent the postcard appears in an almost angelic pose?

And… why do I get the same postcard again the next day? Are the senders trying to say something about my memory?

Whose bright idea was it to allow motorcycles to come up between two lanes at a stoplight? They are the new entitled citizens, as they sprint from the light and zoom away from us poor vehicle-driving smucks.

And now we have e-bikes that are going 30 miles an hour…on the sidewalk, passing poor Mildred, trying to take her poodle for a walk. Pretty soon, pedestrians will be walking on the grass like it’s the normal thing to do.

Why do my knees ache every time I come down the stairs in the morning…and my hips…and my lower back…and my toes…and…

Why do I feel guilty if I don’t leave a tip for the pimply-faced sixteen-year-old at the fast food establishment even after a third of my three-item order never made it into the bag? Is it my lifelong existence in Baptist congregations that causes the guilt response of a twenty percent tip?

If I decided to get a full-sleeve tattoo on my left arm, would I still be able to see the goosebumps? (I’m not, in case you’re wondering! I can barely endure my four-year-old grandson putting a sticker on the back of my hand!)

Why do ripped jeans cost more?

Why does the entertainment industry, more often than not, portray clergy persons (pastors and preachers) as doofuses, allergic to laughter, and not people you would want to have conversations with?

Random thoughts. I can’t help it. Hey! There goes a squirrel! I wonder if squirrels work eight-hour shifts and then go home to their squirrel recliners? I wonder if squirrels leave a tip for other squirrels?

Grief Coaching

July 1, 2026

Jesus wept.” (John 11:35)

My coaching buddy and friend, Joe Miller, passed away about a week and a half ago. I wrote about it in my last blog post.

Briefly summarizing, he collapsed at the end of the kids’ basketball camp session we were doing at the high school, and he could not be revived. We did CPR, got the paddles of the AED device ready, but he was gone.

Our high school girls’ basketball players were there helping with the camp for young kids. For most of them, before they were quickly ushered out of the gym, the last scene they unfortunately had to take with them of their coach was him laying on the gym floor. It’s a memory that will be difficult to heal from.

So, the last few days have had me coaching them, not in basketball, but in dealing with their grief. Grief coaching is similar to basketball coaching in that the person never reaches a point where you don’t have to work on it. Like practicing your jump shot, it’s a constant journey, an ongoing part of the game of basketball that must be worked on.

Grief is like that. It is a continuing journey that will never reach a point of finality. There will always be moments of reflecting, struggles with keeping emotions under control, and battles of isolation and inappropriate behavior. It’s a journey, a hard journey, peppered from time to time with laughter and storytelling.

Sometimes in coaching, the coach has to let the team, or an individual, work through it. He figures out when to get involved and when to sit outside the goings-on. My grief coaching mirrors that. Sometimes I need to explain, and sometimes the grievers must be allowed to go through the fires. Since grief is different for each person, as a coach, my sensitivity to the situation dictates my response. I look for the one who pulls to the side because the moment is too painful, and I look for the one who dominates conversations instead of being part of them.

Honestly, my soul is weary, and I recognize my need to grieve as part of them, but also by myself… quiet moments in the steps of long walks.

But, like with my players, it’s a journey.

Missing Joe

June 21, 2026

My friend and coaching buddy, Joe Miller, had a medical emergency at our kids’ basketball camp Friday morning, and, despite giving him CPR and having the EMT’s come and continue working on him, he could not be revived.

Two days later, I’m just beginning to come out of “crisis mode”, where your focus is on the situation, and then our players and Joe’s family, figuring out who needs to be contacted next. Coming out of crisis mode means the impact of the loss hits you in the gut and your emotions play havoc with your reactions that usually don’t cause a reaction, your need for alone time that, at a moment’s notice transitions to a need for together time, and also your own mortality that you realize is as fragile as that glass vase you’ve been afraid will be accidentally knocked off the counter and shatter into a thousand pieces.

This was my third year as an assistant for Joe on the Liberty High School girls’ basketball staff. We worked well together, enjoyed the humor of situations, shook our heads at the weird things that happened, and the out-of-control people we would sometimes encounter at games. When you’ve shared history, you cherish the retelling of shared experiences.

Both of us were from southern Ohio, he from Lucasville and I from Ironton, two towns less than an hour’s drive apart. We knew similar stories from our neck of the woods. I bought him a book last year about the professional football days of Southern Ohio, when Portsmouth had a team, and Ironton had the Ironton Tanks. Those were pre-NFL days, and we enjoyed the history of the ancient past.

For me to write this blog about Joe is part of my dealing with the grief. I needed to put it into words. It may not be read by many folk, but the “number of readers” has no connection to my walk with his loss.

Pray for the Liberty Lancer girls who were there when he collapsed. The painful ache they are experiencing reveals the specialness of their relationships with their coach. Pray for his family, his wife and three children who are in their young adulthood.

What drew me to join Joe in coaching the Lancers was his character and integrity. I had coached his son back in middle school, so we had a long history of knowing each other and respecting each other. There are coaches who know the game but are tyrants to their players, and there are coaches who have solid relationships with their players but can’t teach the game to save their players. Joe knew the games, loved his players, and was loved by his players. That’s why I said yes when he asked me to join him. And it’s why the pain is intense right now. I don’t have my friend to retell the shared stories with. He’s not there for me to say, “Remember when…”

He will, however, always be remembered.

Settling

May 25, 2026


“He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” (Psalm 46:10)

How much can you put on your plate? If you’ve ever been to a buffet, you know there is the temptation to overload your meal plate with more food than you’ll need, and so much food that you won’t really enjoy it. What you thought was going to be a delectable, taste-satisfying experience becomes more of a drudgery. The smile has disappeared as you hoist one more bite of the mashed potatoes and gravy that now feels like a lump sliding down to your stomach.

I confess that I have a tendency to fill my plate to the point that some of my helpings are dangling over the side.

Except now I’m talking about the things that I keep putting on my plate: the tasks I heap onto the pile, the commitments I slide into a sudden opening, and the requests from people I know who trust that I’m capable. I confess that I have difficulty settling into a life that has some space on the plate. I suppose it hints more at my need to be needed than at my ability to get things done.

Of course, I can rationalize that the portions I pile on my plate are necessary, that they have purpose. I compare my plate with the plates of others who heap their lives with meaninglessness, wasted time doing things that have no benefit and purpose besides self-gratification and pleasure.

Geez! I sound arrogant and obnoxious in those words.

Lord, help me to trim down and settle into a rhythm with Your Spirit. Help me scrape a few things back to their origins. Help me give myself permission to create some space for breathing and meditating.

Amen!

Scrolling Down

May 3, 2026

      “Now if we died to Christ, we believe we will also live with him…For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace.” (Romans 6:8, 14)

Scrolling is this thing these days. People scroll through their phones to find relevance, meaning, and something that raises eyebrows. 

Driving my two oldest grandkids around could be described as a conversation punctuated with bouts of scrolling. I’ll be having a conversation with one of them about the importance of being grounded in the faith, and suddenly, a seizure of scrolling invades our space. 

Scrolling to find out which of their friends has posted a selfie that does not have any beneficial value to society as a whole or any individual purpose. Scrolling as a new form of twitching. Scrolling as a way to avoid having a mundane moment. Scrolling is the younger generation’s version of daydreaming— a spontaneous moment of withdrawal. Be a senior citizen among three young scrollers, and you may begin to question your value.

Of course, I realize that a few readers of this blog scrolled down to it! The “whiner” about scrolling isn’t helping his case. I’m also guilty of scrolling down the programming guide on TV to see what’s on. If I hadn’t done that, I wouldn’t have found out about the recent Outhouse Sledding Championships on ESPN. (Yes, that’s a real event!)

Truth be known, I’ve encountered scrolling in another way, a more humbling way. I’m now having to do a lot of “age-scrolling.” That is, I’m filling in information on my cell phone or laptop for a new physician, specialist, driver’s license renewal, insurance information, school certification renewal, workshop sign-up…need I go on! And when I’m asked my age, I have to scroll down…and down…and down. The longer I scroll down, the closer to the deathly bottom I get. The year 2000 disappears from the screen as I continue to go down. My first child’s birth year, 1981, rises past me, and there goes my high school graduation, 1972) and I’m still sinking deeper. Scrolling down is a way of putting me in my place— close to the end of the road— and reminding me of the fact that most people are above me…scrolling-wise.

My scrolls are clarifications of my mortality. It’s the harsh truth of our deteriorating bodies. My prescription bottles, aching hips, and suspect hearing are also teammates of the downward scrolling to my demise.

I take comfort in the hope of Romans 6, where Paul says, “Now if we died to Christ, we believe we will also live with him…For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace.” (Romans 6:8,14)

When one of my students or athletes…or even one of my granddaughters reminds me of how old I am, I am now prone to reply, “Yes, only by the grace of God am I still scrolling down.” Confusion surfaces on their faces. 

I just smile. 

Use Words

April 1, 2026

Laziness brings on deep sleep, and the shiftless go hungry.” (Proverbs 19:15)

Convenience is a big deal these days. Although my memory is suspect, I can’t think of a single invention in the past umpteen decades meant to slow the process of making, creating, or cooking something. By necessity, the latest-and-greatest has to be quick and painless, or it will be a bust.

How do you determine what is convenient versus what is laziness? That’s a toughie! I like my air fryer and microwave that cut cooking times dramatically. More than that, I like being able to buy an already-cooked meal at the store and heating it up for a minute. Is that convenience or laziness? Yes!

In recent times, with artificial intelligence, shortened to AI, so it doesn’t tax a person’s busy schedule or pronunciation deficiencies, the time it takes for a less-than-motivated student (who wants to get back to his video games) to write a school essay has dramatically dropped. He doesn’t even have to use words. AI does the “wording” for him.

A close friend of mine hates it when he sends a three-paragraph text filled with deep thoughts and compliments, only to get a thumbs-up emoji. I have to admit that I sometimes respond by sending him three to four emojis lined up in a row, just to irritate him (in a friendly way). His beef: Is it that hard to use words?

My beef: No wonder people can’t spell these days. Letters that form words are like a foreign language. For some people, it’s like learning Latin…and when you see how they spell words, you feel like you ARE reading Latin.

Laziness brings on future issues. In every area of our lives, there are fundamentals to learn. Like brushing my teeth so that some day in the future I don’t look like a cartoon character; or learning to add so I don’t stand before the register person at McDonald’s looking like a doofus because I couldn’t figure out that a Big Mac Meal plus a six-piece McNuggets cost more than the ten-dollar bill I’m holding. When you skip by the fundamentals and go directly to a nondescript thumbs-up emoji, you expose yourself to the crimes of apathy, sloth, and idiocy.

Bottom line: We tend to be in a hurry to avoid responsibilities and in no hurry to fulfill important courtesies. Can I get a thumbs-up followed by clapping hands?

Playing Dead

February 13, 2026

When this perishable body puts on imperishability and this mortal body puts on immortality, then the saying that is written will be fulfilled:

Death has been swallowed up in victory.”
55 “Where, O death, is your victory?
    Where, O death, is your sting?” (1 Corinthians 15:54-55)

In my substitute teaching adventures, I am not adverse to the idea of facilitating the fun factor for the classroom. Although my days in the classroom are winding down, students at my middle school still seem to light up when they see I’m the guest teacher for the day. Oh, there are the warts who seem to enjoy being the cause of chaos. They are the ones who I believe have season tickets to the principal’s office, seats with their names on them.

For the most part, however, the students energize these old bones of mine. Last week, I played dead. They enticed me to lay on a classroom long table while they said kind words over me. It was the last of fiove days subbing in their sixth grade classroom. During the week, we had discussed “grandma candy”, buying their first car (Thankfully, a ways down the road!), the growing number of fidgets, and how short and unfair their lunch period is.

So playing dead was an appropriate way to end the week. Their words weren’t scripted by the students. They searched for nice-sounding adjectives that seemed complimentary to their short-lived instructor stretched out on a hard-surface tabletop.

Death has chummied up to me too frequently in the last few months. Old youth group members, college classmates, current and former church members, and, most recently, my college classmate, teammate, and wedding groomsman, Stan Brown. All have been officially laid out. It’s caused me to appreciate anew the awesomeness of the resurrection and the promise that eternity holds for us.

The only uncertainty that a Jesus-follower has about death is when its arrival has been determined. As I layed on that classroom table, I had about five seconds of resting in peace that comforted my tired feet. Then, with outstretched hands, I gather myself up and shouted to the wide-eyed students, “He rose again!”

I’m not sure many of them made the “Up from the grave, he arose” connection, but a few did, and they smiled and giggled in delight at the “conquering death” moment as they departed for life in their school hallways.

Looking Like Carl

December 15, 2025

 And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” (2 Corinthians 3:18)

The Youth Sunday School Class I teach told me that I look like Carl Fredricksen from the movie “Up.” They even found a picture on the internet and displayed it on the screen in our classroom…with me standing beside a backgrounded Carl. Unfortunately, there was a resemblance. I’m a few years away from(hopefully) being a full-fledged member of the Carl Club, but he is leaking into me.

Most of us are hopeful that we resemble someone who is nice, or at least good-looking. A good friend of mine was compared to supervillain Gru from the “Despicable Me” film series. Funny how both of us have been compared to animated characters.

My hope is that, despite my similarities to Carl, minus the walking stick, I am resembling Jesus a little more each day, as opposed to being villainous and despicable. It’s a daily…no, I mean an ongoing moment-by-moment possibility. The closer I stay to Jesus the more I understand His mercy, compassion, forgiveness, and grace. When I talk about needing peace of mind, I need only to look in His direction and have a chat with Him about my troubled soul.

Our culture’s understanding of transformation is more instantaneous. You weren’t, and now you are. You didn’t have it, and now you do. My hunger was transformed in a few moments by the super-sized McDonald’s meal; and then shortly after that, my appeased appetite would be transformed into indigestion. Transformation is understood differently in the physical world.

In the spiritual world, it’s a journey, more like slowly turning a giant freighter in the midst of the vast sea. It’s a daily prayer of repentance and hope, thankfulness and praise.

I am thankful for others who have been on this journey before me and whom I can look to as reflections of Jesus. My dad was one of those. Some say I am a physical recreation of him. He was the Deacon Emeritus of his church, a man wise and grounded, kind and friendly, a listener and a doer. In his last couple of years of life, he had what was called a “hurry-cane,” like Carl’s, but he was never in a hurry when there was someone who needed a word of encouragement or redirection.

I may look like Carl Fredricksen, but I hope I reflect Laurence Wolfe.