Archive for the ‘love’ category

65 Years of Journeying

August 13, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                              August 13, 2013

     Today is the 65th wedding anniversary of my mom and dad. Not many people can say they’ve been married to the same person for 65 years. It’s one of those things that people respond to with wide-open eyes of unbelief and ask “How long did you say???”

My mom and dad “lasted” this long because…because…here it comes…they loved each other and love each other deeply.

The problem is that few people today know what ingredients go into a recipe for love. It’s not always the warm fuzzies that people think it tastes like.

Let me tell you what I believe has gone into my parents’ marriage.

The Salt of Shared Pain- I remember hearing conversations of loss. When words left their sting on my mom, my dad would be the listening ear, the agent of comfort. As they went through the difficulties of losing parents and siblings to death they cried on one another’s shoulders. Pain can often be lonely business. It can cause us to retreat into a place of isolation, but Mom and Dad walked through it together.

The Cinnamon of Intimacy- My parents did not shy away from embracing or kissing one another in front of their three kids. One of the things I remember my mom saying to my dad quite often was “Kiss me, Slobber Lips! I can swim!” I crack up when I think about that still. They conveyed through their hugs and words that they loved pne another. It seems that this usually happened right after dinner, which takes in the next ingredient.

The Sauce of Servanthood- I don’t remember that dinner was the responsibility of just one of them. Although my mom did most of the cooking, Dad would be involved in setting the table, or washing the dishes (unless it fell to one of the kids). When we had mashed potatoes he always got the assignment. Whenever we had liver and onions, not one of our favorites, he was tasked with the cooking. If it was fried chicken or cooking a pot of garden fresh green beans, it was Mom’s turn to shine. The smooch after dinner was almost like a kiss of appreciation and partnership. They had finished the day of work and home duties together.

The Cream of Commitment- Like cream in a soup that filters through the whole batch, my parents committed to one another…for better or for worse…for richer, or, for most of the time…poorer…in sickness and in health (That is the everyday journey right now!). I had never heard of the word divorce until my Uncle George got married. And then when he got remarried to someone else I didn’t understand it, because Mom and Dad were always together. It didn’t matter when the income was barely able, if possible, to meet the bills. It just meant a couple of more meals of beans. I can’t even picture one of my parents not being there, because they have been…for sixty-five years!

The Vanilla of Spirituality- Some people see the word vanilla and they think it indicates blandness, dullness, but the ingredient of vanilla is precious. In lay terms it’s expensive! My parents marriage has been a dance with God. I’ve never known a time in my life when I didn’t go to church…except for about a year in college when Bedside Baptist gained a new member, and I was enjoying the Sunday morning messages delivered by Reverend Sheets. I was raised in church, but my parents modeled Christ-like behavior and lives. My dad’s meal-time grace was heart-felt. Mom’s involvement in choir and a women’s missionary circle were exercised expressions of her Christian walk. They sat in worship together Sunday morning and Sunday evening. I wanted to be a Methodist growing up because I knew their children were home watching Walt Disney while I was sitting in a church pew. Mom and Dad always sat together in church, side-by-side, unless they had a kid between them that needed to be “secured!”

The Sugar of Simplicity- Mom and Dad were not defined by their possessions, their home, the cars they drove. They seemed to like American-built cars back in the day, but that didn’t matter that much. Whatever they had they took extremely good care of it. Vacations were spent back on my grandparents’ farm in Oil Springs, Kentucky, and that usually meant helping Mamaw and Papaw Helton with some of the farm chores. Relaxing was sitting in one of the front porch swings watching the occasional cars drive past. That simplicity, however, was special. Watching The Ed Sullivan Show on Sunday night after getting home from church (still a little disgruntled about the Disney thing!), while eating popcorn…that was a picture of our family. That was special and meaningful.

The recipe has several other ingredients that have been put into he soup, but, I guess what I’m saying is that my parents’ 65 year marriage shouldn’t be the oddity. Is it wrong to think that it should be the norm?

Would the world be a little less chaotic and topsy-turvy if my mom and dad weren’t see as being unusual?

Turning Churches Into Cathedrals

June 29, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W                                                                  June 28, 2013

 

     In Santo Domingo today we visited the oldest church in the Americas, the Cathedral of Santa Maria la Menor. It was built between 1512 and 1540 under the leadership of Bishop Fray Padilla. Being in a five hundred year old church is quite an experience, especially considering the age of church in our own country.

    But Cathedral of Santa Maria la Menor is now more like a museum than a church. Tour groups come in, pay their admission fee, and then receive headphones and a transistor player that guides each of the group members through the church. There are a number of small side chapels, most of which are closed off to keep the tourists at a distance. The church is ornate and massive. Groups are told to be quiet because there may be people there who are trying to pray.

     Bottom line, however, the church is now a tourist destination because it’s old!

     It hit me that centuries ago people wouldn’t have thought about taking a tour of it. They would have gone there to worship, to pray, to be a part of a spiritual community, to receive words of hope and instruction, and partake of the Eucharist.

     My fear is that the church today will be a museum years from now. That we will slowly be transformed into a destination for people who are looking for a aide trip instead of people looking to be close to God.

     It is a turning point time for the church. And what has hit me this week is that people are looking at a church to see which it is and will be. In working with children here in Santo Domingo we know that they are looking to the people of God for a hand up; that is, to help them reach up to a life that doesn’t just talk about hope, but becomes “realized hope.” They are looking to the people of God not just to say the words, but to live the words.

     When words are lived churches continue to be beacons of light and people of mission. Tour groups don’t visit to take pictures of dead saints; people visit to see the living saints.

     This week a few of our mission team became first-time sponsors of some of the children of Herrera. The children will see in the coming year that the church is active and loving. Why else would someone from Colorado want to see a little boy from Santo Domingo live a full, healthy, and purpose-filled life?

Museums don’t care about the visitors; they just take care of the exhibits.

     The people of God care for the visitors and those who even live far-away, as they exhibit the grace of God, and the hope of life lived for the Lord.

Promising Basketballs

June 28, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                      June 28, 2013

 

On our first day of basketball camp at Grace School in Herrera (an area in the inner city of Santo Domingo…kind of like saying “The Bronx” as a part of New York City), I made a promise to the kids. At our first session that first day we only had eight children. We had planned on a hundred for each session (although, in hindsight, we are somewhat thankful that didn’t happen).

A couple of our VisionTrust bags on our trip down were filled with deflated basketballs that had been donated. We brought seventy-five balls with us and spent a good deal of time putting air in them after we arrived. So on Monday I opened my mouth and inserted tennis shoe, and said that we would give a basketball to each child on Thursday, our last day of camp.

Many basketball camps in Colorado Springs do that. I had just helped at a camp at the Classical Academy a couple of weeks ago and each of the fifty campers got their own basketball.

So…no big deal, right?

Yesterday…Thursday, after our first session…the one that had eight children the first day…thirty-seven basketballs were handed to kids as they left the 8:30-10:00 session. By the end of the day we had given out all of our basketballs…plus the fifteen that the school had…plus we have the names of the eleven boys who did not receive one yet.

I need to buy the eleven plus replace the fifteen! It is an expensive lesson on making promises to kids…who have cousins…who have cousins!

In essence, about a hundred basketballs, or the promise of a basketball, exited the building yesterday. And I was the one who did the training session for our team about the American tendency to treat the problem of poverty with the solution of “giving people things.” Poverty is really brokenness…brokenness in terms of a person’s relationship with one or more of the four foundational relationships: with God, with myself, with the rest of creation, or with others.

We often treat the symptoms of poverty without acknowledging the core problems.

So today there are many children in Herrera who have a new basketball, but they still returned to the same situations of brokenness in their homes and communities.

I guess my hope is that as they hold their basketballs they will think about the week they had at camp, the hope of Christ that we shared with them. That as they think about some of our daily lessons of jumping, shooting, and shooting an impossible shot, they will think about the lessons we taught concerning grace, forgiveness, and the love of Christ.

Last night we met two exceptional young people who are graduating from high school- Pamela and Delton- who come from very difficult situations. Pamela taught herself English. She spoke to us last night more clearly than many of us talk. She volunteers with VisionTrust two to three days a week, and wants to major in tourism. Delton, who looks like a six-foot Kobe Bryant, and plays like Kobe, grew up in an orphanage, Remar. He is heading to the University next year, but wants to help the children who are still living at Remar. He wants to major in computer engineering.

Both Pamela and Delton were redirected in the course of their lives because, first of all, God loves them, and secondly, because God grabbed hold of the heart of some people and made them realize that he had a purpose for the lives of a little girl and a little boy, but that purpose could not be realized without someone being obedient to God’s beckoning.

It makes me wonder how many children are lost because someone didn’t heed the calling of God to come alongside.

A new basketball will not change any of the lives of those hundred children, but perhaps it will help them to know that there is a way of hope, a place of grace, and a plan for their lives that will lead them to make a difference.

I still have to get twenty-six more basketballs! I’m okay with that!

Meeting The Children

June 28, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                        June 27, 2013

This week, if you have been reading my blog, you know that I’ve been in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic as a part of a sixteen person mission team doing basketball camps and construction projects. The construction crew painted all of the classrooms and the hallways so that when the 400 students come back to school in August they will be greeted with a fresh look, a new beginning.

Today many of us were able to meet the children that we sponsor through VisionTrust. Carol and I have been sponsors for several years, but today was the first time I was able to meet our two Dominican children face-to-face. Alexa will be in sixth grade. I can tell that she loves to laugh and talk. She is cute as a button, and shared that she loves all food…even veggies!

I found myself getting emotional as I met her and talked, through our translator, with her. I’m not sure why my eyes got a little misty, but I think it was probably because today was a connecting point- connecting the sending of our financial sponsorship each month with who it is helping. I have to admit that Carol and I have sponsored children for so long that it has become easy to see it as a monthly bill to be paid instead of a gift to help someone in a different country. Just send the bill in with a check along with the utility bill and car insurance bill.

Today, however, gave me a completely new appreciation.

And then I met Johan, a third grader, who was shy and much as expansive in his answers to my questions as Alexa was. I’m sure it was a little intimidating for him to meet an old guy for the first time who kept asking a lot of questions about him and what he liked and didn’t like, favorite school subject, how many siblings, etc.

Alexa and Johan, two children who I will pray will be held in God’s hands, protected and growing each day.

It was a good day! A day of firsts. Perhaps tomorrow I will write about how I put my foot in my mouth on the first day of basketball camp this week and ended up giving away 91 basketballs.

 

P.S. The Cunfer family is awesome! They met the child they sponsored today also. Like me they connected to points that gave them a new perspective.

A Day of Humidity and Humanity

June 27, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                  June 26, 2013

 

The Dominican Republic is hot and humid. It is so humid that if you looked at yourself in a mirror your reflection would start sweating. Today was the most humid yet since we’ve been here. By the end of the first basketball camp session at 10:00 we were drenched. “Nacho”, one of our translators who also takes care of arrangements at the mission house where we saty, continually reminds us to drink water…to stay hydrated.

The humidity usually means an afternoon shower. If the rain shower happens, or seems like it about to happen, about the time our afternoon session is to begin the kids aren’t there. Today when it was time for our 1:30 session to begin there were no campers present.

1:35 the same thing.

1:40…we had one!

By 2:00, however, we had close to 40 there. It makes schedule-oriented people a little crazy.  Or should I say schedule-dependent Americans crazy? Dominicans might tell many of us Americans to lighten up!

But several things hit me today about humanity as well. The kids who are coming to camp this week love to laugh just like we do. The girls like to cluster together…just like many American pre-teen girls do. And the young boys here also like to wrestle…not pay attention…goof around…but give our coaches high-fives…just like little boys in America do.

There is no difference in behavior tendencies. Young boys here walk around with untied shoelaces and “barn doors wide open” just like American kids do.

There is also no difference between broken hearts of young kids in the DR and young kids in America when they lose one of their parents. Today at the end of our camp day Sydney Cunfer reminded me that we needed to pray with Christopher, a young boy about fourteen, whose father is presently imprisoned. A moment later Christopher was coming up the steps from the gym and we stopped him. Sydney, Emily Lundquist, and I asked him if we could pray for his and his father. I gently said to him that I had heard his father was having some difficult days. His face went quickly to a pained look of sadness. We prayed and hugged on him for a couple of moments.

Losing a parent tears at the emotions of any child. A little later on today before he left, Christopher came up to Sydney and thanked her for praying for him.

A day of humidity that has drenched us. A day of humanity that has gripped our hearts.

Basketball Is Basketball

June 26, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                           June 25, 2013

 

On our second full day in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic one of the things that has become evident is that “basketball” is a universal language. As we teach it and play it with the people of Herrera, and we struggle to know the Spanish language, basketball is understood by all. When I played a game of three-on-three and got teamed up with two Dominicans we all understood “pick and roll” without saying a thing. We understood “give and go” without opening our mouths.

Basketball has therefore become a way of connecting when words fail us. It’s the bridge over the confusion.

The first two days of camp I have used fundamental skills and teachings of the game of basketball to proclaim the truth about God. Yesterday I used the perfect positioning of our hands on the basketball when we shoot it to talk about the perfect positioning that God’s hands have on our lives. Today I used an illustration about an impossible shot made possible to talk about how God can take something that in impossible for us to do and make it possible.

Basketball has become the filter to talk about the relational gospel. Tomorrow I will use another situation from the game of basketball to help me convey the truths of grace and forgiveness.

Herrera can be a depressing place to live in. We’ve seen some things here this week that none of us have ever seen before. The school we’re at, Grace School, is a beacon of hope in an area that many several years ago was rendered hopeless. Now the school is held in high regard by the community because the community has seen so many lives redirected and transformed.

One of the young guys who has been at basketball camp this week is named Christopher. His father is imprisoned right now, charged with a very serious crime. Christopher has been devastated by the loss of his dad in his daily life. His attendance at camp has been a time of happiness for him. Sydney Cunfer, a 15 year old exceptional young lady on our team, said to me last night, “We should pray with Christopher before we leave here.” I told her that we would look for that opportunity to happen.

Basketball has provided that opportunity to care, to connect, and be used by God to come alongside.

I’m learning so many lessons this week about my “middle-classism”, about how privileged, probably over-privileged, I am. That things I have come to expect are not necessities. That what I think is a need is really just a want.

I’m learning how to say certain Spanish words…and struggle in saying other words, but more about that tomorrow.

Praise the Lord for basketball, and the chance to talk in a same language with kids who we have come to love.

Rhythm Preaching

June 24, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                     June 23, 2013

Our first full day in Santo Domingo was full of new experiences and meeting new friends. We worshiped with The Church of the Liberator, which meets on the top floor of Grace School in the area known as Herrera. The top floor, depending on who you talk to, is the fourth or fifth floor of the building. It is actually the rooftop with a metal roof above it. That may not make sense..unless you’ve been there!

I had the privilege of giving the sermon. It happened to be the 34th anniversary of my ordination service…but it was the first time I had ever preached with a translator. Reuben, a twenty-one year old Dominican student, who was a high school exchange student for a year in Minnesota, stood by my side and we started. The text I read was from John 9:1-9 about the blind man who Jesus made spit mud for and placed on his eyes. He follows Jesus’ instruction to go to the Pool of Siloam and wash it off, and when he does he can see.

I began cautiously. One of our young people said, “Wow, Pastor Bill! Just like back at our church…they didn’t laugh at your jokes either!” She was kidding…I think.

I talked about being blind to what Jesus is doing, and Reuben followed closely behind. I gave a phrase, and Reuben repeated. We got to a point where it seemed almost natural, like inhaling and exhaling.

Whenever I mentioned that Jesus frees the enslaved, or gives sight to the blind, or takes the burdened and gives them release…and then Reuben translated…there was a chorus of “amens” from the Dominican congregation.

The Church of the Liberator is attended by people who have experienced liberation. It is not a white collar suburban congregation, or a contemporary emergent generational church with high-quality graphics and sound. It is not a high-church congregation that prints off a 12 page bulletin each Sunday. Rather, it is a congregation of people who understand in new and transformational ways the rhythm of God in their lives.

Reuben and I preached. We danced the story of release of the captives. Pastor Osvaldo prayed a prayer of blessing over me, and he closed the service with a closing prayer of thanksgiving for the blessings of God, the grace of God, the gospel of God that The Church of the Liberator is proclaiming.

And to that, both Reuben and I say “Amen!”

A 3 A.M. Start

June 22, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                           June 22, 2013

 

I arise at 3 in the morning tomorrow! There is something awkward about getting out of bed before Starbucks even opens! 3 A.M. Is one of those times where you’re not sure whether or coming or going…or both at the same time, so you smack into yourself!

The early start is so I can arrive at church at 4:00, so our mission team can pack up, pray, and be on the road to Denver International Airport by 4:45. Several people told me this past week that they would be praying for us…from their beds that morning.

For the next week I’ll be posting a Words from W.W. From Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic. I’ll post something each evening about what has happened that day…about the people we meet…the children who will be attending basketball camp…the interactions between our team members with the Dominicans, and also with one another. I’ll try to share with you how we have been blessed, challenged, and transformed.

Our team of sixteen goes expecting to see God work, but, quite frankly, I’m sensing that God will be transforming each one of us even more than the people whose homeland we’ll be visiting. I’m expecting that new revelations about our own lives will come to us.

It will be long hot days in Santo Domingo. Our basketball staff will be conducting three camp sessions each day (8:30-10:00, 10:30-12:00, 1:30-3:00) for a hundred different kids each session. And then from 3:30-4:30 some of the young men in the community have been invited to come and play hoops with us (if enough of us are still standing). During the 90 minutes I’ll be presenting a devotional thought to start with. We call them Buddy Basketball values. They tie some aspect of the game of basketball to the gospel message. Basketball is a great teaching tool to talk about hope, to talk about good news.

Each evening we’ll spend some time as a team debriefing and sharing God-stories from the day. I’m excited to see what God is going especially do in the lives of the men who are a part of the team (Seven of us!).

It all starts with a splash of hot water in my face at 3 A.M, and my Keurig waking up about ten minutes later.

Pray for us!

Being The Student As You Are Teaching Others

June 19, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                      June 19, 2013

 

Everyone of us learn in different ways. Some are audio learners; they simply have to hear it. Others are visual; there has to be a picture for them to see. Still others have to be hands-on, they have to be touching something for it to click in their heads.

On Saturday I head to Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic, as a part of a sixteen person mission team that will be conducting basketball camps and doing construction projects at Grace School in Herrera, and inner city area of city. I go to teach and preach, to help children discover new things, to speak about the love of God and hope of Christ.

But I go as a student who will be teaching others!

How often does that happen? For me, quite often. I learn as I lead. I go as the “expert” who will end up being taught more than he imparts. It demands a sense of “teachability.” How often did Jesus meet with the teachers of the law who were going to teach him a thing or two? There were a few moments where the teacher was taught by the Teacher, but most of the time it seems that the teachers got angered at the idea that Jesus either knew more than them, or that he didn’t agree with them.

Teachers need to be taught. If not they become hardened opinionated “sticks-in-the-mud!”

I’ll be going into a completely different culture where life happens each day in a different kind of normal than I’m used to. Not normal for me is a Starbucks shop that is empty. This is going to challenge my understanding of not-normal.

Different language! I barely passed Spanish in high school, and that happened only because I could cheat off Betsy Wolfe’s paper in front of me. (No relation!) I’ll be learning every day. The excitement of learning will be tempered with a fear that I inadvertently say something that “You mama’s breath smells like cow dung!” I wonder how that would go over?

Lord, help me know when to just nod my head! Help me to communicate non-verbally in ways that speak the love of Christ! Lord, help me to learn things that I never knew; and experience things that will transform me as a follower of Jesus!”

It’s going to be awesome, and I hear they have good coffee there as well!

Christian Chat Rooms

June 17, 2013

WORDS FROM W.W.                                                                          June 17, 2013

I’m not a Chatty Cathy when it comes to talking to people on-line. It just seems a little too weird.  Of course, a lot of things seem weird to me. Reality TV is an experience in weirdness. Having a pet snake is weird to me. $150 a pair sneakers are weird. Having to pay more for airport parking as a result of a flight being delayed is weird…and a rip-off. Painting your face the colors of the team you’re cheering on is weird.

But that’s just me! My wife thinks I’m weird because I used to listen to my Pepsi after pouring it into a glass. I rarely drink Pepsi anymore so it’s a weird trait that I’ve been cured of. I sleep with my own personal blanket. I agree, that’s weird, but keep your hands off!

Recently I got linked up with a type of “chat room” for obnoxious Christians. It’s one of those on-line groups where you can comment on a theological question like “Will there be dogs in heaven…and will they still poop?”

Questions that are being asked by the masses.

I didn’t know I was getting into a group of cantankerous Christians. LinkedIn had suggested it to me. Now I’m not sure if they suggested it because I was judged as being cantankerous or because I’m listed as a pastor…or, it just occurred to me, I’m a cantankerous Baptist pastor.

Whatever the reason the contributors of this on-line group go at one another! A person’s salvation is often questioned. There are suggestions of having an on-line fight with a person’s “virtual dukes.” It gets nasty. People put certain words in capital letters to emphasize that they are more Christ-like. Today someone commented how amazed he was that so many people in the group reject what the word of God PLAINLY says!

A recent topic was “Do I have to baptized to go to heaven?” For every capitalized “NO” there was a capitalized in bold print “YES!!!!” People threw scripture around like it’s a battering ram.

It’s an experience in a lack of on-line hospitality.

Last week’s question on “Once saved, always saved” was more heated than my hot tub. The one before that on women’s ordination had more emotion than the Presidential debates.

If the Council of Jerusalem had been like this they never would have debated Gentiles being a part of the faith. There would have been blood on the debate floor before they ever got to that point.

And the thing is everyone in this group is a follower of Jesus. It just seems that some believe they are following more closely than others…like they are touching the fringe of Jesus’ cloak while others are following at a distance because THEY PLAINLY HAVE FALLEN ASTRAY!!!

I haven’t supplied a comment or opinion to any of the questions yet. I’ve got to let my self-confidence rise a little bit more before I do that. Otherwise I may get torn to shreds and have to be saved and baptized again THE RIGHT WAY!

Bottom line: I’m amazed at how Christians treat one another. I have always believed that we are to hate the sin and love the sinner, but this group have gone to the next level: Hate the sin and really hate the one who disagrees with you!