Words from WW Blog

A friend I’ve known for twenty-plus years shared with me his disgruntlement with the actions of a close relative. As a result, there was an important event coming up in the relative’s life that this person was considering not attending. I asked him the question, “What will she remember five years from now, that you were there or not there? Will she remember the problem you had with her at the time, oir will she remember your presence on an important day in her life?”

Most of us are impacted by the short-sighted decisions we make that cause long-term grief. In the heat and emotion of the moment, words are said that cause years and years of pain. Or the attractiveness of a situation causes us to disregard the red flags that are waving in the background.

It’s too bad that we don’t live life with a rewind button that could back up the time to pre-dumbness. Or maybe have one of those five-second recall switches that would allow us to do a retake, kinda like a math test do-over. There’s been a few miserably memorable utterances I’ve made that I wish I could do-over. Like when I called one of the fifth-grade teachers at my elementary school “an old bag” in an effort to impress my friend. Soon after, Mr. Morton made an impression on my behind that brought warmtyh to the situation that lasted a lot longer than my two seconds of lunacy. It was like having an excessive amount of Bio-Freeze applied to my britches!

More accurately, our short-sighted solutions to our situations is more problem-creating. It brings to the surface the importance of having people around us who can see the consequences that we have become blind to, friends who are wise and care for our wellbeing.

Dealing with young adolescents, I see the impact that short-sighted decisions have, but also how friends who don’t have a lick of sense can add to the pain of those decisions. After all, they are middle school students. Sometimes, all it takes it for one goat to jump into the pit and all the others follow. I needed a couple of goats who stopped at the edge and said, “Hey! Let’s think about this for a moment.”

I think of some of the commercials on TV that try to make sports gambling look fashionable and, as we used to say, “hip.” In a time when debt is out of control, there was more money gambled last year than ever before. Short-sighted visions of riches almost always leads to long-term despair.

Back to my friend, I’m waiting to hear what he decided to do. Hopefully, he surrendered to a few moments of uncomfortableness to nurture a vital relationship. If not, I may have a few more conversations in the near future about consequences and healing a fractured relationship.

It’s May. A few days ago, I advanced the number roller of my tens column from 6 to 7. That means a lot of things, like having people look at my driver’s license and then giving me a sympathetic look…as if I have one foot in the grave and the other with curved arthritic toes. Or like yesterday when I played dodgeball with sixth-graders and this morning, as I trudged down the stairs, my knees and back are asking in a physical whining sort of way, “Why did you do that?”

Hitting 70 means, optimistically, that I may have 20 years of birthday celebrations left—maybe more, maybe less! Using that calculation, it means my battery is down to 28%.

More importantly, it causes me to consider how to finish well. How does a person finish well? At our final middle school track meet this week, one of our sprinters stopped running hard ten yards from the finish line. As a result of not finishing well, she went from second to fifth. The coaches and many of her teammates will remember her not for the first 190 meters but rather for the last 10. On the opposite side, another one of our runners slipped on the wet track at the starting line, recovered, and finished in a blaze, winning by five meters in the league championship 200-meter race. He will be remembered for how he recovered from adversity and finished strong.

I’ve been blessed to know people who don’t coast or give up but strongly believe that God has purposes for their lives. They live life with that viewpoint—no whining, no bemoaning about what is and what could have been. They are partners in the Master’s Plan.

Truth be told, as we go through this life journey, we get dinged up like a 59 Chevy. The hurts and hits of life slow us down, bring doubts into our minds, and cause us to wonder about our resilience and abilities. The grey replaces the brown, the wrinkles overshadow the grace, and our physical limitations supersede our expectations. And yet, the wisdom gained through our life experiences is a precious gift that is imperative for us to share. There is soundness and substance in what has been experienced.

As 70 in one way, defines me, it causes me to consider what I principles I need to pack for the rest of the journey.

1. Just as God considers me important enough to have a relationship with, the personal relationships I have are to be treasured and cared for.
2. Who I am is a result of who has been part of my journey.
3. Laugh often and bring laughter to others.
4. Contentment doesn’t come as a result of doing or having what our culture says we should have.
5. Each day is a gift from God. Don’t waste it.
6. Don’t be afraid to risk…but don’t do stupid either (like jumping out of a plane!).
7. The list of what you can do should always be longer than the list that keeps saying you can’t do.
8. Pray for your kids and grandkids, and hopefully your great-grandkids!
9. Fill your life with simplicity, like watching The Andy Griffith Show, taking long walks, and reading books that warm your souls.
10. Finally, hang out with middle schoolers and even play dodgeball with them, with the understanding that in doing so you make a big target. It brings delight to them!